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Politically Correct Little Red Riding Hood [本]


Politically Correct Bedtime Stories

Politically Correct Bedtime Stories

  • 作者: James Finn Garner
  • 出版社/メーカー: Souvenir Pr Ltd
  • 発売日: 2012/04
  • メディア: ハードカバー



政治的に正しい赤ずきん~ハハハハハハハハハ~

Little Red Riding Hood

There was once a young person named Red Riding Hood who lived with her mother on the edge of a large wood. One day her mother asked her to take a basket of fresh fruit and mineral water to her grandmother's house – not because this was womyn’s work, mind you, but because the deed was generous and helped engender a feeling of community.
Furthermore, her grandmother was not sick, but rather was in full physical and mental health

and was fully capable of taking care of herself as a mature adult.

So Red Riding Hood set off with her basket through the woods. Many people believed that the forest was a foreboding and dangerous place and never set foot in it. Red Riding Hood, however, was confident enough in her own budding sexuality that such obvious Freudian imaginery did not intimidate her.

On the way to Grandma’s house, Red Riding Hood was accosted by a wolf, who asked her what was in her basket. She replied,“Some healthful snacks for my grandmother, who is certainly capable of taking care of herself as a mature adult.” The wolf said,“You know, my dear, it isn't safe for a little girl to walk through these woods alone.” Red Riding Hood said,“I find your sexist remark offensive in the extreme, but I will ignore it because of your traditional status as an outcast from society, the stress of which has caused you to develop your own, entirely valid, worldview. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must be on my way.”

Red Riding Hood walked on along the main path. But, because his status outside society has freed him from slavish adherence to linear, Western-style thought, the wolf knew a quicker route to Grandma’s house. He burst into the house and ate Grandma, an entirely valid course of action for a carnivore such as himself. Then, unhampered by rigid, traditionalist notions of what was masculine or feminine, he put on Grandma’s nightclothes and crawled into bed.

Red Riding Hood entered the cottage and said,“Grandma, I have brought you some fat-free, sodium-free snacks to salute you in your role of a wise and nurturing matriarch.”

From the bed, the wolf said softly,“Come closer, child, so that I might see you.” Red Riding Hood said, “Oh, I forgot you are as optically challenged as a bat. Grandma, what big eyes you have!”“They have seen much, and forgiven much, my dear.”“Grandma, what a big nose you have – only relatively, of course, and certainly attractive in its own way.” “It has smelled much, and forgiven much, my dear.” “Grandma, what big teeth you have!” The wolf said,“I am happy with who I am and what I am,” and leaped out of bed. He grabbed Red Riding Hood in his claws, intent on devouring her.

Red Riding Hood screamed, not out of alarm at the wolf's apparent tendency toward cross-dressing, but because of his willful invasion of her personal space. Her screams were heard by a passing woodchopper-person (or log-fuel technician, as he preferred to be called). When he burst into the cottage, he saw melee there and tried to intervene.
But as he raised his ax, Red Riding Hood and the wolf both stopped. “And just what do you think you’re doing?” asked Red Riding Hood. The woodchopper-person blinked and tried to answer, but no words came to him.

"Bursting in here like a Neanderthal, trusting your weapon to do your thinking for you!" she exclaimed."Sexist! Speciesist! How dare you assume that womyn and wolves can't solve their own problems without a man's help!" When she heard Red Riding Hood's impassioned speech, Grandma jumped out of the Wolf's mouth, took the woodchopper-person's ax, and cut his head off.

After this ordeal, Red Riding Hood, Grandma, and the Wolf felt a certain commonality of purpose. They decided to set up an alternative household based on mutual respect and cooperation, and they lived together in the woods happily ever after.

anyone can write a haiku [言語]

細い月
首縊りには
ちょうどいい

新月细如钩
挂根绳子上吊用
再妙不过了

crescent in the sky
all you need now is a rope
to hang yourself high


from Kevin Turvey to Gideon Pryke [TV]

a sad story about sid vicious turning into paul mccartney in 30 years, lol

rik - kevin to gideon.jpg

rik mayall made my day~ today, and yesterday, and the day before yesterday, and...let me see, everyday since 6th sep, when i accidentally watched 'comedy connections', the episode about 'the young ones'. never thought i'd ever miss that sitcom. well i watched the whole series coz i knew it was a cult and it made me laugh, but (as a snob bravely speaking) slapstick and knob jokes were never really my cup of tea. and then, 4 years later, 'comedy connections', click, i fell for rik!

the self-employed investigative reporter kevin turvey, the I'm-not-a-girl-at-all rick in 'the young ones', the often annoyingly over the top but always weirdly sweet richie in 'bottom', the smug face perfect family man in 'all about george'...and so much yet to discover...

by the way, 'rik mayall presents...' series was really really good. well maybe not so perfect as a tv series, but if he only wanted to show off how handsome and attractive good he could be as a straight actor, he made it. so now you can mess around as much as you like dear, not with a quad-bike though ~



タグ:Rik Mayall

Nothing Will Die and All Things Will Die [映画]


All Things Will Die yet Nothing Will Die

elephant man - 2.jpg

Nothing Will Die

by Alfred Lord Tennyson

When will the stream be aweary of flowing
Under my eye?
When will the wind be aweary of blowing
Over the sky?
When will the clouds be aweary of fleeting?
When will the heart be aweary of beating?
And nature die?
Never, oh! never, nothing will die;
The stream flows,
The wind blows,
The cloud fleets,
The heart beats,
Nothing will die.

Nothing will die;
All things will change
Thro' eternity.
'Tis the world's winter;
Autumn and summer
Are gone long ago;
Earth is dry to the centre,
But spring, a new comer,
A spring rich and strange,
Shall make the winds blow
Round and round,
Thro' and thro',
Here and there,
Till the air
And the ground
Shall be fill'd with life anew.

The world was never made;
It will change, but it will not fade.
So let the wind range;
For even and morn
Ever will be
Thro' eternity.
Nothing was born;
Nothing will die;
All things will change.


××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××

All Things Will Die

by Alfred Lord Tennyson

Clearly the blue river chimes in its flowing
Under my eye;
Warmly and broadly the south winds are blowing
Over the sky.
One after another the white clouds are fleeting;
Every heart this May morning in joyance is beating
Full merrily;
Yet all things must die.
The stream will cease to flow;
The wind will cease to blow;
The clouds will cease to fleet;
The heart will cease to beat;
For all things must die.
All things must die.
Spring will come never more.
Oh! vanity!
Death waits at the door.
See! our friends are all forsaking
The wine and the merrymaking.
We are call'd -- we must go.
Laid low, very low,
In the dark we must lie.
The merry glees are still;
The voice of the bird
Shall no more be heard,
Nor the wind on the hill.
Oh! misery!
Hark! death is calling
While I speak to ye,
The jaw is falling,
The red cheek paling,
The strong limbs failing;
Ice with the warm blood mixing;
The eyeballs fixing.
Nine times goes the passing bell:
Ye merry souls, farewell.
The old earth
Had a birth,
As all men know,
Long ago.
And the old earth must die.
So let the warm winds range,
And the blue wave beat the shore;
For even and morn
Ye will never see
Thro' eternity.
All things were born.
Ye will come never more,
For all things must die.


津軽旅行2013 [旅行]

長い間更新してないね。今はまさかPeter Capaldiが本当に12th Doctorになっちゃったことで頭いっぱいだっていういいわけがあってね、何も考えたくないから、7月にやっと書き終わった3月31日ー4月5日の津軽(+三沢)旅行レポを更新としてここにも載っておこう~

とにかく青森に行きたかったが、具体的に何処に行けばいいか分からなくて、ちょうど太宰治先生が「津軽」って観光ガイドを書いてくれたので、その一冊をもって行ってみてきました。

まあ中国語だから日本語のところに載ってもしようがないけどなアハハ

20130331【三沢】http://t.cn/zTfzJuQ
20130401【蟹田+龍飛岬】 http://t.cn/zQyv41o
【蟹田番外】http://t.cn/zHloHQp
20130402【青森+五所川原】 http://t.cn/zQyv416
20130403【金木】 http://t.cn/zQyv41a
20130404【弘前】 http://t.cn/zQyv41X
20130405【五所川原+小泊】http://t.cn/zQyv41S

【青森行程篇】http://t.cn/zTSRdvx
【孤独的美食家篇】http://t.cn/zTqYmBG
【孤独的美食家篇之东京中野番外】http://t.cn/zTqYmBq

秋田の八竜村にも行きたかったのにな。ネットでバス時刻表が見つからない所に行く勇気がなかったな。JRの駅から8キロ?10キロ?そりゃ歩くって心細いですよ。義春のような友達がいたらいいな(いや、あんな安い宿に泊まるなんて絶対いやなんですが)。imaginary友よ、お前ら本当に頼りにならないヤツばっかり!

come the fuck in.jpg
(source: tumblr)

all right all right i'll come in then, if you're kind enough to take me to Hachiryu? you know it's only Japan not really far from here... well compared to your travels across all those galaxies that i've never heard of... and i don't even ask for travelling through time, well for now... although i know it wouldn't be very exciting after all the thrilling adventures you've experienced... and i might turn out to be a boring companion... but if you really don't mind, if you insist...wait wait what's wrong open the door don't go wait doctor doctor~~~


Jeremy Bentham - present but not voting [ほか]

Jeremy Bentham auto-icon.jpg

The Auto-Icon of Jeremy Bentham
http://www.ucl.ac.uk/Bentham-Project/who/autoicon

世界一活躍的な死体アハハハハハハハ!


へえ、social capitalって社会のお金って意味じゃないの? [ほか]

Maybe Bowling Alone Isn’t So Bad - How the prevalence of civic associations in Weimar Germany may have sped the rise of the Nazis
(click to read the whole article)

QUOTE:

Social capital is typically taken to be a good thing. But even Putnam, in the book-length version of his essay, noted that social capital can have its dark side: To the extent that groups encourage their members to focus their energies inward (as is the case with some religious, ethnic, or political groups where membership excludes those without particular beliefs or connections), they can breed intolerance and suspicion of outsiders. Putnam largely dismisses such concerns, but a fascinating study of civic associations during the Weimar Republic, by economists Nico Voigtländer and Hans-Joachim Voth and political scientist Shanker Satyanath, demonstrates the terrifying power of social capital gone awry. The researchers document that membership in the Nazi Party spread most rapidly in areas of Germany where civic associations were strongest, indicating that the social capital played a hand in building the most destructive political movement in modern history.


寺山修司もたまには分かりやすい詩を書いてくれたので [本]

ちょっと中国語に訳してみました…

みじかい恋の長い唄
寺山修司

この世で一番みじかい愛の詩は



と一字書くだけです
この世で一番ながい愛の詩は
同じ字を百万回書くことです
書き終わらないうちに年老いてしまったとしても
それは詩のせいじゃありません

人生はいつでも
詩より少しみじかい
のですから


中国語訳:

短小的恋爱长歌

世上最短的情诗
就是“爱” 这一个字
世上最长的情诗
就是这同一个字写百万遍
诗未尽人已老
并不是诗的错
人生
总是比诗
要短一些


*******************************

幸福が遠すぎたら
寺山修司

さよならだけが
人生ならば
また来る春は何だろう
はるかなはるかな地の果てに
咲いている野の百合何だろう

さよならだけが
人生ならば
めぐりあう日は何だろう
やさしいやさしい夕焼と
ふたりの愛はなんだろう

さよならだけが
人生ならば
建てたわが家は何だろう
さみしいさみしい平原に
ともす灯りは何だろう

さよならだけが
人生ならば
人生なんか いりません


中国語訳:

如果幸福太过遥远

如果别离才是人生
一次次到来的春天是什么
那遥远的遥远的世界尽头
原野上绽放的百合是什么

如果别离才是人生
相逢的日子是什么
那温柔的温柔的晚霞和
两人的爱是什么

如果别离才是人生
我们建起的家是什么
那荒凉的荒凉的平原上
亮着的灯是什么

如果别离才是人生
这种人生 不要也罢


タグ:寺山修司

「ワルツ」コード耳コピ  [音楽]

間違ってると決まってるんだろう耳コピその4


ワルツ
友川かずき

Gm Cm D# D
D# D D# D Gm

Gm Cm
流れてそして君 
D# D Gm
ボロボロになるのだや君
Gm Cm
夢は はてなく宙舞い 
D# D Gm
雲みたいに漠々とあるのだや
Gm Cm
生きても 生きてもワルツ 
D# D
死んでも 死んでもワルツ
Gm Cm
出会いも 出会いもワルツ 
D# D Gm
別れも 別れもワルツ


晒すのは恥しかない 
ありのままあらん限り
血肉とて いつかは 
皮膚を出て不明になるのだや

切なさを生きて君 
前向きになるのだや君
物語は らせんに 
この世からあの世へとかけのぼる

冬空をけちらして君 
いざり来る 春もまたある
春雷に 御身を君 
遊ばせて きっと復讐産むのだや

生きても 生きてもワルツ 
死んでも 死んでもワルツ
出会いも 出会いもワルツ 
別れも 別れもワルツ

Gm Cm D# D
D Cm D# D Gm


本物:
http://www.xiami.com/song/3491773
http://www.xiami.com/song/1769224722



タグ:友川カズキ

「彼女は革命家」コード耳コピ [音楽]

間違ってると決まってるんだろう耳コピその3

彼女は革命家
頭脳警察

G Am D G D

G   Em    
僕の隣に座ってる 
G D
マルクス片手のブルージーンズ
Am D
彼女は革命家 
Am D G D
ランラランラーン

僕はあいつに狂ってる 
もう闘争なんかどうだっていいさ
彼女は革命家 
Am D G F
ランラランラーン

F G
薬もやらない 
F G
男も知らない
Am F G    
闘争だけがあいつの命 
F Am D
でも僕は僕は僕は

そんなあいつが好きなんだ 
僕も飛び込もう 
あの渦の中へ 
ランラランラーン

僕はいつも探してる 
あいつの笑顔を
彼女は赤軍派 
Am D G D G
ランラランラーン


タグ:頭脳警察
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